Tuesday, February 10, 2009

It's All Fun and Games Until.....

I woke up this morning thinking maybe I should take away the participation prizes. You worked for it. You earned it. But maybe someone else should have it. You know, someone who didn't show up, didn't do the work, had lots of reasons why she couldn't do the work. Maybe she should get the prize. Why? Well because, you already have tshirts and goodies. And really, have you noticed....many people in our country, and in this world, they don't like you. Yes, I know it's all based on assumptions that are mostly unfounded. I was thinking that if we just give them what you have earned, maybe they won't be so bitter and angry. What? No, no, I tried that. They don't want to work. Well yes, they are capable. But, I can't make them show up and earn something. Listen, just trust me, it's easier this way.

I know you worked for every bit of it. Yes, I hear you. I understand that you were hoping to share your goodies with your children and family. No, I am not sure how you will have enough for your own family once I take what you have earned from you. No, I can't really answer your questions. No, I don't have to either. I am taking your prize. I will be giving it to someone who should have and could have participated. Now stop whining and get back to work, so you can support her. Me? Of course I'm working. You can find me in that big building up on the hill. Well, unless I decide I need a break, or it's time for bed, or that I need a few weeks off. You can't imagine how hard it is to be me.

Ha! Just kidding friends! Of course I would never take away your participation prizes. I just couldn't resist having some fun. Especially since the "everyone's a winner" had you wondering if I might possibly be a closet Democrack, or that I had fallen victim to the Obama lover syndrome.
Filthy. Filthy talk I say. You know better. And just for clarification...I do not let my kids win at games. I am more than happy to whip their bahookees and do a victory dance. In fact, I think it's time for me to dominate Princie at Littlest Pet Shop Go Fish.

14 comments:

KC Mom said...

Ohhh..you are a tease!!
Please never go to the dark side.

Kim said...

Thanks to you, I'm now having intelligent conversations about political issues. Seriously, I've always been a listener and head-nodder when I'm in a group discussing politics, a little afraid to open my mouth since I didn't want to sound stupid or ignorant. Well, Snarky Girl, you've helped me change that. You break down the issues so well that I'm getting a lot more confident and interested in the issues of politics. I know you are thinking "it's about TIME!", but better late than never, right? Thanks!

mom said...

Well, that's a relief. I really did not want to say anything, since I am your "mom" and all, but dad and I were discussing the possibility you had "cracked."

We were looking into an "intervention" and possibly placing you in "Demo-non"...you know the 12 step program to get people off Democrack!

You are funny....victory dances and all!

jen said...

FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY I've discovered a group of women that can discuss real things and real issues with their tongue firmly in their cheeks.
KUDOS to all
(Kudos aren't a giveaway, are they?)

Sue said...

You're a good example to me, Natalie! I'm getting so bugged about the whole "stimulus" thing that I've lost my sense of humor on the subject. This morning, you have successfully revived it!

Maybe you could just give a home to those who didn't "work" for your prizes. That's what's been done in the past, I believe. Of course, some might say that such an action could put you in the poor house, but we all know now that giving things to people who haven't earned them won't hurt a bit. Thanks to Obama, we've come to realize that only one thing breaks the bank, and that's when George W. gives massive tax cuts to overpaid, undeserving "rich" folk. Can you believe some of them get away with donating only half of their income to the cause? Thank heavens we don't have to worry about THAT kind of selfishness anymore...

What a relief. (And I don't mean the tax kind.)

So let's see some real largesse on your part. Bring on a few new homes for the non-participants in your contest process. After all, they need a place to rest from their non-labor-intensive efforts, right? And maybe you could just cut them a check, too.

Oops. Did I say "check"? Wait! I meant "tax rebate." (And you thought this was a giveaway...)

Silly Snarky.

=)

L said...

hehehehe! That wasn't funny, you can't joke like that. Bad Snarky, bad! :-)

em said...

hahahaha, guess you answered jen and my question! happy tuesday, sprinkled with laughter. did you know it's cold in vegas this time of year? me neither.

karen said...

For just a second...you had me. It was a little mean.

Gretchen said...

Very funny:)...

I'm glad I'm still a winning loser.

Valsy said...

This begs the question--Are we still losers if we won a prize?

karen said...

I think I'll go with Gretchen: I'm just glad I'm still a winning loser. You tricky Snarky, you! This is the most fun I've had discussing politics EVER. Which makes me ask: did you happen to catch any snippets from a town hall meeting with Obama in Florida? Fort Meyers, I think. Unbelievable...

Kirk said...

You're definitely right. I think a lot of people confuse equality of success with the equality of opportunity. Everyone has the right and ability to make a "winner" out of themselves. It's when the "everyone is a winner" crowd gathers around their bonfire and decides to make a list of 95 reasons that they and their "cause" aren't ruling the world, only to nail it to the door of those they spend every waking moment and dollar they earn envying the successful because of their ambition and success that is in no way tied to their religious handout mentality.

Carly said...

Hmmm, as a Republican I am disgusted by the idea of redistribution of prizes, however, as a lazy bum who ran out of time to answer the contest and feels bad about it, I say, yeah, give the prizes to me! No effort, all payoff. I've never been on the lazy side before, but it's so much easier. No wonder Democracks have so many followers. Give me, give me, give me, I need, I need!!!!
Of course, I could just do better next time, but that's harder than doing nothing.

K2cole said...

I love your blog - your snarky comments are so inline with what I am saying out loud to my computer or to the TV. Found you linked with my pal Jen. You go girl!

Karen