Friday night, the 17 year old daughter of dear friends was killed in an auto accident. As I spoke with her sweet father yesterday, all I could speak were the words, "We love you, we are so sorry." Now is not the time for telling them how blessed their family was to have Megan for 17 years..they already know, that is one reason for their intense sorrow. Now is not the time for repeating doctrine, for reminding them they will see her again...they already know, but that fact does not erase the pain that comes with knowing it will feel like forever before that time comes. And during that forever, during this new life they have been born into, it is going to rip their hearts into shreds over and over and over again.
I hate the phrase "Time heals all wounds." Let me tell you what I know, time heals nothing. Time leaves scabs and scars, it leaves ugly evidence on hearts and souls. But, our Savior, He heals. He heals all wounds. And because of His power, He leaves no scars behind. In place of the wound, our Savior leaves a larger capacity to love. He leaves greater knowledge of Himself, and undeniable evidence of charity. He leaves behind increased courage to make it through years, that at times (because you miss your loved one so deeply) feel like forever. He leaves hope.
I will not tell them these things now. It isn't the time. Right now, there are no words I can form, no words powerful enough to put even the slightest dent in their shock and pain. I know the only words to say to these people I love are: I am sorry, and I love you.
All other words are useless right now, unless being uttered to our Father in Heaven. I pray that our Savior will hold their fragile hearts in His palm until they are ready to begin the healing process. I pray they find strength to make it through the next few days without feeling literally exhausted. I pray they might feel their burdens being shared by all of us who love them. I pray all of these things on behalf of the two young men who were also in the car. Theirs is an unbelievably long road ahead, and I pray for their parents as well. Your prayers would also be greatly appreciated. I know the One who stands ready to heal, and He is listening.